Untamed by Glennon Doyle

• Facebook
• X
• ShareCopied to clipboard

INITIAL THOUGHTS

I picked up Untamed for a women’s group book club at work. I’d heard about the hype, #1 New York Times bestseller, a million copies sold, and picked for Reese’s Book Club, so I expected something profound, maybe even life-changing. But from the beginning, I was confused by the lack of structure and underwhelmed by the narrative. I kept hoping it would click, but I was bored, skeptical, and unsure what all the fuss was about.

WHAT IT IS ABOUT

In this memoir-meets-manifesto, Glennon Doyle shares a series of personal reflections that explore her divorce, coming out, motherhood, faith, and the journey to reclaim her authentic self. Untamed frames itself as a call for women to stop striving for external approval and trust their inner voice.

MY REVIEW

Writing Style

Conversational to a fault. The informal, anecdotal tone seems raw and authentic but comes across as staged and performative. Many of the stories felt embellished or implausible. Some dialogue, especially from Doyle’s kids, felt unnatural and overly convenient for the lesson she was trying to make.

Themes & Messages

The core message is women should stop suppressing themselves and live truthfully. This message is powerful and necessary. Topics like motherhood, queerness, and self-liberation are essential. But the delivery lacked cohesion, and the life lessons felt scattered. It was hard to deeply engage with any theme before the book jumped to another.

Characters

Since this is a memoir, Doyle herself is the main character. While I admire her vulnerability in writing about divorce, blended family life, and sexuality, I struggled to connect with her on the page. Her insights filter through a lens of “motivational speaker energy” rather than grounded, lived experience.

Vibes, Settings, and Tropes

Untamed isn’t a linear story. It’s a collection of lessons, vignettes, and reflections. That format could work well if more clearly organized, but it felt chaotic. Grouping similar reflections into thematic sections might have added the missing focus and flow.

Favorite Quotes

“This life is mine alone. So I have stopped asking people for directions to places they’ve never been.”

“Mothers have martyred themselves in their children’s names since the beginning of time. We have lived as if she who disappears the most, loves the most. We have been conditioned to prove our love by slowly ceasing to exist. What a terrible burden for children to bear—to know that they are the reason their mother stopped living. What a terrible burden for our daughters to bear—to know that if they choose to become mothers, this will be their fate, too. Because if we show them that being a martyr is the highest form of love, that is what they will become. They will feel obligated to love as well as their mothers loved, after all. They will believe they have permission to live only as fully as their mothers allowed themselves to live. If we keep passing down the legacy of martyrdom to our daughters, with whom does it end? Which woman ever gets to live? And when does the death sentence begin? At the wedding altar? In the delivery room? Whose delivery room—our children’s or our own? When we call martyrdom love we teach our children that when love begins, life ends. This is why Jung suggested: There is no greater burden on a child than the unlived life of a parent.”

“Privilege is being born on third base. Ignorant privilege is thinking you’re there because you hit a triple. Malicious privilege is complaining that those starving outside the ballpark aren’t waiting patiently enough.”

What Worked For Me

• The idea behind the book is to encourage women to live untamed and stop molding themselves to fit societal expectations.
• The celebration of queer love and redefinition of motherhood and family structures.

What Didn’t Work For Me

• Disjointed structure and abrupt shifts in the topic.
• Anecdotes that felt embellished or inauthentic.
• Writing that felt more like a staged TED Talk than a sincere memoir.
• Lack of emotional depth or fresh insight.
• Nothing felt revelatory or inspiring.

Final Thoughts

I didn’t connect with this one. While I respect what Doyle is trying to do, empower women to trust themselves and live truthfully, I found the book messy, overhyped, and frustrating. If you enjoy personal development books with motivational flair and don’t mind nonlinear memoirs, this may be better for you. But if you’re looking for grounded storytelling and deep reflection, you should skip it.

Let’s Talk

Have you read Untamed? Did it resonate with you, or did I feel the same disconnect? What’s a memoir that did move you?